Tuesday, December 9, 2014

epic fail, with joy

Last August I decided I needed to go back to school.  More specifically, I decided to take a class in wound/ostomy/continence care, to pursue certification as a WOC nurse.  The program I chose was a graduate level class with a year of knowledge crammed into a semester.  Online.

I almost hyperventilated as I sank more money than I could imagine on something I would only experience through the computer.  I am comfortable with a computer.  That wasn't the issue.  It was that I spent the better part of 9 years without much time off, and working 2 jobs (or more) while attending classes.  I survived, swearing I would never go back to school.  EVER.

Then I did this.  I struggled with a new set of rules and regs, screwed up a few times, had a hard time focusing to study (recommendation was 2 hours a day...I think I might have studied 2 hours a week). I felt like any minute I would fail.

But I didn't.  I made it through lectures.  Made it through proctored finals (3 times) when some kid would ask me for my ID, and search my room (using MY webcam) for any lurking cheat sheets or dust bunnies that looked suspiciously like cheat sheets.  The first time I went through the process, I felt violated.  By the third time. I was ready to take the test naked if I could just GET FINISHED.

I also foolishly signed on to the NaBloPoMo December daily blogging challenge TWO DAYS BEFORE MY FINAL FINAL.  The thing I neglected to think through was that if I didn't pass that last test, the whole semester was shot.  That's right.  It was all or nothing.  So I wrote and posted on my blog those first two days.  By the 3rd day, the day of my final, I had been without sleep for long enough that I was delusional and thought I didn't have to study much.  Translate that to mean that I procrastinated... painting my nails, coloring my hair, and waxing parts of my body I had no business waxing, until 2 hours before the test, when panic finally set in and I studied.

And passed.  And crashed after it all.  For days afterward I was a zombie, until I woke up one day and realized several things.

1. I was finished with class.  I HAD PASSED.
2. I was going to miss being able to fart out loud and drink a glass of wine while taking a live class.  
3. I had failed at the NaBloPoMo daily blogging challenge.  (Again.)
4. I still had clinical practicum to complete before the class was truly, really completed.

Clinicals in January and February.  Jacksonville, here I come.  Brace yourself.

EPIC FAIL, with joy.  The best is yet to come.

...life is good. find your joy.  ~cath
find me @jonesbabie on Twitter


  1. Finally a chance to read it without ads all over the body. Love it Cath, and spent another hour rereading some of your older blogs. Have a perfect day sweetie, love you, Vix.

    1. Not sure what you meant about ads Vix. You can hit that little X in the corner and get rid of them. But glad you enjoyed it. Posts are fewer now, but I still enjoy sharing them with you. :)

  2. I think this was a success! You had done more than most of us could ever claim or even attempt!! Congratulations, Cathy! Now you can take some break (I hope), sleep and drink that wine ;-)

    1. Thanks Joy! Yes, I plan to relax and enjoy some reading, and spend some time with my paintbrushes again, which have been neglected for months. (And definitely some wine!)

  3. I absolutely love this one, Cat and can't tell you enough how proud I am of you. I share with my friends what an inspiration (both) my sisters are, for different reasons. I will always look up to you (and Vix) for all you've accomplished in life. Love you ~

    1. And you are OUR inspiration Doojy! Love you too, kiddo.