Friday, September 10, 2010

regarding arnaldo and other armadillos

We have swapped our intruders of the two legged variety (see intruder alert blog posts) for one of the four legged variety...  It went down something like this the other night....

Steve had installed a flood light motion detection device, in order to trap the teenage window beaters harrassing us for several nights.  After that issue was settled (my refrigerator cop magnet scared the shit out of them), we never got to test the light...until the Easter Bunny showed up one night and every time he moved the light came on flooding our bedroom with artificial sunlight...he'd freeze...light would go out...he'd move...light on...freeze...light off...until Steve was screaming in agony and beating on the windows and begging him to leave...and swore if he could find the little bastard he'd be a dead bunny...of course the EB made a clean getaway...

All was well for a few nights...until one night the light came on...the conversation went something like this:

Steve: do you see the light?
Me: yes I see the light.
Steve: what do you reckon it is?
Me: I have no idea.
Steve: should I get up?
Me: might be a good idea.

And so Steve rolls out of bed and peeps out the window...about that time the light goes out and Steve gets back into bed.



Me: what was it?
Steve: an armadillo.
Me: how do you know that?
Steve: I could see him creeping along by the fence.
Me: you're sure it was an armadillo?
Steve: yes it was.
Me: why didn't he set the light off when he moved away then?
Steve: because he's a smart little sucker and realized what he had done when he came in the yard so he knew to sneak out along the fence so he wouldn't set off the detector.

And that night I learned that armadillos are smart.  Of course not all of them are smart...there are too many armadillo roadkill victims on the highway.  But we must have been blessed with the smartest armadillo of them all.

Steve: the light's on.
Me: I see that.
Steve: should I get up?
Me: if you want to but it is just Arnaldo the armadillo back again.
Steve: yah you are probably right.

Arnaldo has visited several nights and has gotten so good at it that he doesn't even wake the dogs up.

                                               Other things I have learned about armadillos:
1. They will run right over you if you squat down and try to shoot them with a 12 gauge shotgun and get knocked on your ass by the gun's recoil.  (Happened to a friend of Steve's.)
2. They can jump straight up.  Fast.  And disappear when you blink your eyes because you can't believe something that small with legs that short can jump 3 feet straight up then move sideways without hitting the pavement at all.  (Happened to me when I pulled the car up in the yard one night and surprised one on the front porch.)
3. They can roll themselves up in a ball.  Which comes in handy when the grandkids are playing outside and Gabe the lab has chewed their soccer ball to pieces.
4. Calling them possums on the half shell does not make me more inclined to taste one after it has been cooked.

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