Saturday, May 7, 2011

for mary on mother's day

I've been trying to figure out what to get Mom for Mother's Day.  It isn't easy to find something for someone who really doesn't want much of anything, and I always let holidays slip up on me and find myself cardless.  Maybe it's time to try something a bit different.

So this post is for my Mom.  I wanted to spend a few moments talking to Mom.

I don't think I have ever told you thank you Mom.  I know I haven't been the easiest daughter to raise.  I was pretty passive aggressive and downright whiny as a child, and I don't think that has changed much since I grew to adulthood.  So today I am putting on my grown up drawers in order to say a few things to you.

Thank you for being so strict.  I thought you were so mean when you made me do chores, and dumped my drawer in the middle of the room when I didn't pass inspection so I could fold my clothes again, the RIGHT way. 

Thanks for the curfew you set (even the night before I got married).  I thought you were mean when you gave me a curfew, and made my dates come to the door to pick me up.  I realize now that you were taking care of me, making sure I was safe, and learned some morals.

Thank you for telling me I did a good job when I helped clean house (the bathrooms were always my job you said because I did it so well).  I still take pride in cleaning a toilet and making it shine.  I never felt like it was a "dirty" job that was beneath me. 

Thank you for teaching me to do things right, and to believe that any time I did something, it should be done to the very best of my ability.

Thank you for giving us Christmases that were a wonderland of surprise and magic.  I know it wasn't easy to do, but I appreciate the effort, cost and time it took after raising three children of my own.

Thank you for teaching me table manners.  This may not sound like much, but there have been many times in my life when I was dining out and thankful for the lessons of sitting up straight, not talking with my mouth full, and chewing with my mouth closed.

Thank you for telling me the night before I got married that if I wasn't ready, I was not being forced out of the house.  I'll always remember that the next day when I left for my new life as a young wife, I did it with my eyes wide open with enthusiasm and excitement.

Thanks for short-sheeting my bed the first night Steve and I spent in our new apartment.  It was a real icebreaker, and our laughter and relaxation that night has carried right down through these 40 years of life together.

Thank you for never speaking with prejudice about other cultures and races.  I didn't realize how blessed I was by that until I saw prejudice and hate in the world around me.    People are just people to me, and I got that at home.

Thank you for teaching me that just because I am a woman doesn't mean I'm less smart than a man.  I saw you fix plumbing, fix the TV (back when they had "tubes") and run a house alone while Dad was away on flights.  I always thought you could do anything.  I grew up thinking that all I had to do to learn something was read a book or take it apart to figure it out.  Because you did.

Thank you for being the voice of reason this past couple years, when I called for advice about things.  You made me stop and think, before I went diving off a cliff (figuratively).

For all that you have done, I say thanks Mom.  You were the one with us most of our growing years.  You were the one who influenced us most of those years.  I think you did a pretty damn good job too.

Thank you.  I send this little post to you for Mother's Day, to tell you how much I love and appreciate everything you have done for me, because I learned to be a mother from you, and my children learned those lessons from me. 

From generation to generation, the strength of our family goes on.  Carried by the strength and  love taught by my mother.  Happy Mother's Day Mom.


  1. Your Mom must be thrilled to see this post. It looks like together you've done a good job. And how lovely to hear it. How often do we leave what is in our hearts unsaid only to regret it when it is too late. Happy Mothers Day to you both. (We celebrated it here in ─░reland in March)

  2. Amen. Gmommy is one heck of a woman. She made my momma who she is today and, in turn, my momma made me who I am. Gmommy passed down some awesome qualities - strength, courage, independence, character, compassion... these are things that can't be "taught" - they are LEARNED by admiring the person that possesses them. Thank you, Gmommy and Mom, for your inspiring attributes.
    Love you,

  3. Wow. Everything you said is EXACTLY what I have felt all these years. Thanks for beating me to the punch in such an eloquent way. I love Mum for instilling all of the very basics in us in our lives that we carry on to this day and teach our own. Also, Oh I'm not done YET! Mom would say things to me that I share even at work, "appreciate what you have, you don't know when you might not have it" Hugs to all~ and Happy Mother's day ~

  4. That's a wonderful thank you. And ... you've extended your list of 10 things about you by quite a bit.

  5. Beautiful Cath. You're a lucky woman to have had such a wonderful mom and she's a lucky woman to have such a great daughter xoxo

  6. @hocam: You are so right Mary. When my dad died, there were things I wanted to tell him and didn't have time to. I wanted to give Mom something she could enjoy, and at the same time say some things I wanted to tell her before life passed me by. Thanks for such a nice comment.

  7. Thanks Jen, you are an awesome woman yourself, and if I ever feel like I never accomplished anything in my life, I just have to look at you and Jim and Wretch and know that yes, I did something right. xoxo Mom

  8. @Thom: I'm glad this went over as well as it did...I am never sure when I hit the "publish post" button if it is going to make sense to anyone but me...and yes, now you know a bit more about me and how I think :D Isn't that what blogging ultimately is...a self revelation? :D

  9. @Kathy: thanks for those sweet words Kath, I appreciate them. :D

  10. You are so lucky you got to tell her while she could hear it, and let her know all she has done for you.

  11. Such a beautiful thank you note! Your mama sounds like a great lady. :)

  12. @Dawn: yes I thought about that while I was writing it...too often I think about things I wish I had told my dad...this time I got it right. xo

    @Rachel: Mom is a strong woman, and I think that is why the three of us are strong too...thanks for the comment!